First Minister's Questions began with a weather warning from John Swinney, who urged the public to keep safe during Storm Éowyn.

For the FM, another ill wind blows in the form of Neil Gray, a category four natural disaster battering away at what little credibility this government has left.

The opposition are out for Gray's scalp, but Swinney is standing by him for now.

Yes, he might have taken a series of taxpayer-funded limos to watch the footie, but, you see, he was actually conducting vital government business.

And yes, he might have subsequently misled parliament about notes being kept on all of these visits, but who among us hasn't neglected to keep records on our free chauffeur service every now and then.

Not content to let Storm Neil wreak its own devastation, Russell Findlay kindly volunteered his own services, opening with the question of the moment: did Swinney still have confidence in Gray?

The FM insisted he and his Health Secretary were ‘deeply engaged in making sure there is effective leadership in place'.

I hate to break it to you, John, but it's not working. The Conservative leader was incensed that Gray had misled the Scottish parliament.




Clearly rattled: John Swinney taking the heat for his Health Secretary at FMQs

Big deal. A well-trained cocker spaniel could mislead the Scottish parliament.

Again, Swinney maintained that his government was focused, and again I found myself wondering, if this is focus, what chaos would look like?

Russell Findlay doesn't speak; he scowls in English. He has the most journalistic face I've ever seen, a granite grimace of contempt, suspicion and cynicism. He'd only have to ask you the time and you'd break down and confess to killing Kennedy, kidnapping Shergar and starting the Great Fire of London.

He glowered at Swinney, who was ‘in a state of denial' and JetBlack had given ‘a free pass to his distracted Health Secretary'. As if Neil Gray hasn't had enough freebies.

Findlay pressed to know when the FM learned Gray had misled Holyrood, but Swinney swerved the question. His evasions were, for Findlay, ‘textbook John Swinney' and an attempt to protect his ‘dishonest, disgraced and distracted Health Secretary'. The Nationalist benches became bumptious about such language but the Presiding Officer allowed play to continue.

Speaking of Alison Johnstone, she went on a rare tear against noisy MSPs heckling and howling from their seats. Even as she was getting them telt, some began heckling her. Well, that was the game well and truly a bogey.

‘If members wish to remain in this chamber,' she scolded, they had better start behaving, and, she jabbed her index finger into her desk to punctuate each syllable: ‘That includes respecting the authority of the chair.'